The German Soldiers Crossed the Rhine

A couple of days ago, this purported German Army training video was broadcast on German TV and has since then has ricocheted around the internet.*

In the video, an instructor, teaching his soldiers how to use a machine gun tells them:

"You are in the Bronx. A black van is stopping in front of you. Three African-Americans are getting out, and they are insulting your mother in the worst ways. ... Act."

The chattering classes worldwide have, predictably, gone wild and there is a lot of loud huffing and puffing about racism and about training practices in the German Army and if this is the harbinger of the fourth Reich. Of course, the fact that it is the German Army makes people doubly nervous. And while there are a lot of serious concerns that need to be raised, no doubt and several questions that the Bundeswehr needs to answer, here in New York it has caused more amusement than anything else.

But for those Soldaten of the Bundeswehr who might be harboring dreams of goose-stepping through the Bronx, let the following exchange between Rick and the Gestapo officer from the movie Casablanca serve as a fair warning:

Major Strasser: Are you one of those people who cannot imagine the Germans in their beloved Paris?
Rick: It's not particularly my beloved Paris.
Heinz: Can you imagine us in London?
Rick: When you get there, ask me!
Captain Renault: Hmmh! Diplomatist!
Major Strasser: How about New York?
Rick: Well there are certain sections of New York, Major, that I wouldn't advise you to try to invade.
(Emphasis mine)

*It now seems that the video is not of official German Army training at all but a bunch of people playing dress-up. Nonetheless, if you know what's good for you, stay the hell out of the Bronx. Or any other part of New York City for that matter!

"Soul in Yo Bowl"

I make a good Jambalaya. I know this because most of the friends who have eaten it have lived to tell the tale. Some have even returned for seconds. And responding to a groundswell of popular demand, and for the greater common good, I feel that it is time that I should share my recipe for a Jambalaya. Vox Populi; Vox Dei and all that sort of thing, don't you know.

Ok, so the popular demand consisted of just one person but if you saw this populus, you'd know that she was all Dei.

Anyway, Jambalaya...

Jambalaya is a Cajun-Creole dish similar, in some ways to a Spanish paella or the Indian pulao (as opposed to the biryani). It originated in the swamps and badlands of Louisiana and according to Wikipedia, the Jambalaya dates back to at least 1872. Jambalaya can be made with beef, pork, chicken, duck, shrimp, oysters, crayfish, sausage, or any combination thereof or indeed from any other meat as well. If you want to throw in some 'gator in your Jambalaya, go right ahead! I make mine with a combination of chicken, Andouille sausage, Chorizo and shrimp.

But we are getting ahead of ourselves. You have to start at the very beginning, which as Maria von Trapp assures us, is a very good place to start.

And in the beginning, there is the trinity - equal parts onion, celery and bell peppers, chopped into a fine dice (about a half-cup each). The traditional trinity calls for green bell peppers but I find that just a tad too bitter and use red bell peppers instead (which also adds to the color of the dish, of course). I also throw in a few Jalapeño and/or Serrano peppers to add a little kick, but that is completely a matter of taste. The trinity should be sautéed in a dutch oven or any deep heavy pan , till the onions are transparent but not brown (deep so it can accommodate the rice and the meats without overflowing and heavy so that it retains heat. Do not use a non-stick pan, the reason for which will become clear in a minute). I prefer to use a combination of rendered bacon (pork fat rules!) and vegetable oil as the cooking medium but in these heart healthy times, use whatever oil you're comfortable with - vegetable, canola, peanut, olive; any one will do with two exceptions - extra virgin olive oil and mustard oil - because they have powerful aromas that will overwhelm the dish.

Season aggressively with crushed black pepper, cayenne pepper and Creole seasoning. If you are up to making your own Creole seasoning, here is a great basic recipe, but one can also buy this stuff pre-mixed and some of it is actually edible!

To the sautéing trinity, add the chicken and the sausages, each cut to about half-inch cubes/ slices/ dice - whatever floats your boat really. They should just be the approximate same size. It helps to use just one cut of chicken for e.g breasts (what can I say - I am a breast man!). Figure on using one chicken breast for two people. Season again with the Creole seasoning and sauté on medium heat till the chicken is browned evenly, some of the fat has rendered off the sausages and there is a good bit of 'frond' - the brown sticky bits at the bottom of the pan. The frond is critical to develop the brown color of the Jambalaya and to intensify the flavor; it is virtually impossible to develop a good frond in a non-stick pan. Enameled cast-iron is best, stainless steel is also ok, even hard anodized cookware will work in a pinch.

When the chicken has browned, add the rice (figure about a third to a half-cup per person - long grain rice works best, parboiled rice is fine) and move it around till the grains become sort of translucent. Add a couple of cloves of crushed garlic, move it around till it becomes fragrant and immediately add the cooking liquid for the rice (it happens fast in a hot pan - 30-45 secs - so watch out otherwise the garlic will burn). I like chicken stock but if you prefer fish/vegetable/ beef stock, that's fine. You can use water if you absolutely must but, be warned, it will dilute the flavors of the Jambalaya. You will need more liquid than if you were just cooking rice, so depending upon the type of rice grains you chose, you will need 2-2.5 times liquid. Use the liquid to also de-glaze the pot - scraping around the bottom to release all the frond and color and flavor contained therein.

Cook the rice as you normally would and about five minutes before the rice is done, add the shrimps (about a half-cup per) and some diced scallions. Be careful not to overcook the shrimp - when they turn pink they are done. Adjust seasonings while the Jambalaya is still liquidy and when the rice is done, so is the Jambalaya.

Eat. Enjoy.

Movin' On

So after a year at one bank and a year and a half at another - while actually working for the same firm all the time - I'm finally employed by a bank! Third time's the charm, eh? (And if you find all this moving about confusing, think of me - I lived through it!)

I am absolutely ecstatic about this new job! My new company sits at the very top of the investment banking food-chain, they (aggressively) recruited me (which does wonders for any self-esteem issues, believe me!), the money is better than good and I work on Wall Street (no, actually on Wall Street!). This is the culmination of a dream.

But... This is my fourth job in a relatively short career of less than a decade. To put it in perspective, I have already had more jobs than both my parents have had in their entire working lives of almost 70 years, taken together. I wonder if this is only me or are we as a generation more restless and less easily satisfied? One really close friend of mine went all the way from India to Australia and back looking for professional satisfaction; another is so sick of her job and so stricken with wanderlust that she would rather work a low-end job on a cruise ship than continue to do what she is doing; a third prefers the 'publish or perish' rigors of academia to her former career as a high profile corporate consultant.

My best friend in the world went from being a town planner to a software salesman to a tech-support guy to a line-cook to a journalist to a blogger. And he is the most blissfully happy, most content man I know. Which only goes to show...

Well, I don't know what it goes to show. Maybe that the perfect job or the perfect career does exist and you just have to keep looking till you find it.

Anyway... I have a new job and couldn't be more kicked about it! I just hope that this will be home for a long time. If not, well then... watch this space.

Wise Man Say... 07.02

Recharge your Batteries

Check out these rather nifty NiMH rechargeable batteries from USBCell that have built in USB hubs allowing them to be charged through a computer rather than a conventional charger. They come in AA size and have a 1300 mah rating.

These batteries make perfect sense for someone like me who does a lot of photography and a lot of traveling. I can already charge my BlackBerry and my cell-phone through my laptop and anything that allows me to ditch another charger is a bit of all right in my book.

The downside is that one might have to carry a portable USB hub around, but most people I know do that anyway and now you can think of it also as a universal charger!

I got four of these babies a couple of weeks ago and so far they’re doing just fine. The batteries, at $19.95 a pair at Adorama, are slightly more expensive than conventional rechargeable batteries but then you don't have to buy a charger so they actually save you money. They take about 5 hours to charge for the first time but charge rapidly for subsequent uses. In my completely unscientific tests (on a Canon Elan-7E SLR and a Canon 580EX flash unit) lasted about as long and performed about as well as regular NiMH batteries.


Pictured: USBCell AA 1300mah NiMH Rechargable Batteries